The latest happenings of Sim City

SimCityTV has decided to cash in on the reality television craze of watching families be dysfunctional. And on that note we bring you….

Meet Innloine Francois. She inherited her daddy’s ears, her daddy’s nose, but only her little sisters inherited daddy’s money and love. Thus, she transplanted herself in Sunset Valley hoping for a new start. Unfortunately, after finding a place to live, buying a bed to sleep in, and a toilet to do you know what in, she was left with only twenty-eight bucks. Finding a job as a cook was easy enough, finding food was a little more difficult.

After ringing some random doorbell, someone actually let her into their house. Upstairs she found a male; he wasn’t wet-your-pants pretty but nor was he gag-me-with-a-spoon ugly. He also didn’t mind Innloine creepily following him into the bathroom for “chat”.

His name is Stiles. He has a job, which was a huge bonus to Innloine, and he didn’t reject her flirts or kick her out of the house when she helped herself to some food. He did, however, say no to making out after only knowing her for a few hours. She sought comfort, and little did Stiles seem to realize she was merely softening him up for future use.

At her own home, Innloine showed the world that you don’t need furniture to enjoy a meal, and in fact maybe you can even get two things done at once! Even so, the juice drinks weren’t cutting it, so off she went to Stiles’ house for some free grub.

The days whirled by and Innloine managed to get Stiles in bed and into his heart. When she finally went down on one knee and flashed a ring (it was cubic zirconium) he said YES.

After marriage and moving in, Innloine was a bit disappointed to discover that Stiles wasn’t rich, he just had rich friends. Whenever she exited her morning shower she would shed tears. Whether from her fear of water, her worries over money, or because the shower was simply that good, is unclear.

Both Stiles and Innloine desired a bouncing baby boy, and so they quite eagerly went about the baby making process. Coming from a long line of fertile drones, it didn’t take much to get Innloine with child. The pregnancy was uneventful, but when they reached the hospital there were some second thoughts on whether they wanted to have their child here.

And, like all those who foolishly wish and pine for a specific gender, the Francois family was blessed with a girl. And, also, like all families who can’t afford to feed themselves let alone a child, they were blessed with two girls. We can only hope this isn’t a sign of how they feel about their daughters. Here are Isabelle and Iris:

Neither parent could afford to quit their jobs, so although they hated the expense, it was cheaper in the long haul to hire a babysitter. Even if he didn’t actually earn his pay.

Without inner walls Stiles found that his pee time was a little more like “family time” then he would have liked. Innloine didn’t let the lack of privacy stop her from making whoopee.